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Loneliness

Did Childhood PTSD Teach You To FIT Yourself to CRAP?

One of the harmful effects of growing up with abuse and neglect, is that we get ALL too good at fitting ourselves to unacceptable people and situations. Long after normal people would have left the scene, our minds tell us it’s our fault, it’s a unique situation, we should stay and make it work. In …

Did Childhood PTSD Teach You To FIT Yourself to CRAP? Read More »

Childhood PTSD and The Guilty Feeling: When Is It Real?

Abuse and neglect in childhood can leave a lifelong residue of guilt for things that were never our fault. This same fuzzy thinking can ALSO make us numb to the awareness that we HAVE actually hurt someone. This can make it painful to decide whether to stay connected — or cut off contact — with …

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Is Childhood PTSD Making You Seem Unavailable?

It’s very, very common for people with Childhood PTSD to feel they only know how to attract unavailable and screwed up partners. How can you attract healthy people instead? Answer: With a bright cab light. “Cab light” is slang for the vibe you give off to prospective partners, attracting them toward you when bright, or …

Is Childhood PTSD Making You Seem Unavailable? Read More »

CPTSD: Four Discoveries That Revolutionized Treatment

Now that we know adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) can cause neurological changes, the old, mostly psychological approaches to treating CPTSD are making way for newer, brain-based treatments that hold promise for millions of survivors. In this video I talk about four discoveries that transformed our old understanding of the problem. I describe more effective strategies …

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Childhood PTSD and Getting Triggered: How Can You Feel Safe?

When CPTSD is active and our brains and emotions are dysregulated, we can be easily triggered by things that upset us — things people say and do (or don’t do), things that are shocking or hurtful, and just everyday stressors. Getting triggered can cost us hours and days of disruption, so the search for a …

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Part 2: CPTSD and The Pain of Loving Unavailable People

Early trauma like abuse and neglect in childhood can negatively impact our capacity to have healthy romantic relationships. This is the second of two excerpts from one video in my NEW course (there are 27 videos in total). The course is about changing negative relationship patterns that are common for people with Childhood PTSD, and …

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New Video: Trauma-Driven Beliefs That Lead You Away From Good Partners

Hi friends! I’m shooting videos this week for my new course on Dating and Relationships for People with Childhood PTSD, and squeezed in this 12+-minute video, just for my followers, on Trauma-Driven Beliefs as the ultimate relationship-killers. My written post on this topic a couple months ago was HUGELY popular –now here’s a video that …

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Friends With No Benefits: Why Normal Rules Of Dating Don’t Always Work for People With Childhood PTSD

Here’s what they tell you: Work hard in school. Love yourself. Get enough sleep. Say no to drugs and tobacco. Don’t consume sugary drinks. Use a condom. Don’t let yourself be pressured into sex. Accept your body. Get a career before you have children. Eat five fruits and vegetables a day. Breathe!  Don’t bully. Dream big. …

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Childhood PTSD is a Disease of Loneliness. Here’s How to Start Healing.

Childhood PTSD is, in its essence, an injury to our ability to connect with other people. Abuse and neglect early in our lives literally changes our brains. Neglect in particular can physically restrict the normal processes that enable us to identify good, appropriate people to bring into our lives and to gradually open ourselves up …

Childhood PTSD is a Disease of Loneliness. Here’s How to Start Healing. Read More »

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