If you’re feeling like the people YOU like, don’t like YOU — and you don’t know why — the first thing you want to look at is whether you are people-pleasing. People-pleasing is the act of changing yourself to make people like you — trying to match their interests and values, flattering them, and hiding …
I read a short story last week that was about emptiness and love. That funny thing that happens sometimes, happened, and three different people wrote to me within about 24 hours about… emptiness and love. They were feeling — and I think a lot of us are feeling it — a harsh, empty, loveless feeling …
The Emptiness You Feel Is Trying to Tell You Something Read More »
Happy Valentines Day to all you good people out there! I talk a lot about breaking isolation and forming relationships, but a topic many of you have asked me to cover is, how to be in a relationship with another person who has Childhood PTSD. This is such an important question, about something that can …
Is Your Partner’s CPTSD Hurting Your Relationship? Read More »
One of the worst triggers of Childhood PTSD symptoms for many of us is the feeling of abandonment. This trigger is primal because we’re all wired to be loved and included in the tribe as if our lives depended on it. Because in any situation before the last 100 years or so, our lives did …
For those of us who grew up with abuse and neglect at home, it can be hard to know how to ACT in social situations. Here’s an example…. Have you ever been to a hotel where there is a person who is there to carry your bags, and even though you didn’t ask, they carry …
Just like other people, most of us who grew up with childhood trauma want to be, or are in, a loving partnership or marriage. My Dating and Relationships course talks about many of the obstacles we face when meet and form relationships with others. But ONE of the videos in that course is about BEING …
CPTSD: How to Keep Your Brain and Emotions Regulated in a Relationship Read More »
Most people are familiar with PTSD flashbacks — the kind we associate with combat veterans who are haunted by a war memory. With Chronic PTSD (CPTSD), we may have “emotional flashbacks” — mood states from childhood that are disconnected from present day events, though we don’t always know it. If you’d like to learn …
Childhood PTSD has often left us unconsciously anxious, and one sign is that we tend to grasp at things we do want, and cling despite the fact that these people, situations or places make us unhappy. In this video I talk about testing reality by letting go and allowing things to come to you. You …
CPTSD and CLINGING: Try To Let Things COME TO YOU. Read More »
Detecting who is safe and supportive — and who is NOT — is a level of discernment that can be damaged by past abuse, neglect and trauma. In this video I talk about common challenges spotting people who are unhealthy for us. And I talk about the two emotional reactions that must be healed in …
DESTRUCTIVE PEOPLE: Does CPTSD Make It Hard for You to Spot Them? Read More »
One of the harmful effects of growing up with abuse and neglect, is that we get ALL too good at fitting ourselves to unacceptable people and situations. Long after normal people would have left the scene, our minds tell us it’s our fault, it’s a unique situation, we should stay and make it work. In …
Did Childhood PTSD Teach You To FIT Yourself to CRAP? Read More »
