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Attachment

The Emptiness You Feel Is Trying to Tell You Something

I read a short story last week that was about emptiness and love. That funny thing that happens sometimes, happened, and three different people wrote to me within about 24 hours about… emptiness and love. They were feeling — and I think a lot of us are feeling it — a harsh, empty, loveless feeling …

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Dreading Valentines Day? Here’s Something to Heal That.

This Valentines Day, Prepare for REAL Love: Heal the Effects of Childhood PTSD On Your Romantic Life. A history of trauma in childhood can take a terrible toll on relationships. It’s SO common for us to choose unavailable/inappropriate people, get close too quickly, and stay in bad situations because the thought of abandonment is unbearable. Sometimes …

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CPTSD: Are you TRIGGERED by ABANDONMENT?

One of the worst triggers of Childhood PTSD symptoms for many of us is the feeling of abandonment.  This trigger is primal because we’re all wired to be loved and included in the tribe as if our lives depended on it.  Because in any situation before the last 100 years or so, our lives did …

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CPTSD Makes Us Feel DIFFERENT. Are We?

You hear this a lot among people who experienced childhood trauma. They have trouble shaking the feeling that they’re somehow different, as if everyone else seems to know something — how to act, what to say, how to be connected — and that somehow we never got the memo.  Do you ever feel like that? …

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CPTSD and CLINGING: Try To Let Things COME TO YOU.

Childhood PTSD has often left us unconsciously anxious, and one sign is that we tend to grasp at things we do want, and cling despite the fact that these people, situations or places make us unhappy. In this video I talk about testing reality by letting go and allowing things to come to you. You …

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Did Childhood PTSD Teach You To FIT Yourself to CRAP?

One of the harmful effects of growing up with abuse and neglect, is that we get ALL too good at fitting ourselves to unacceptable people and situations. Long after normal people would have left the scene, our minds tell us it’s our fault, it’s a unique situation, we should stay and make it work. In …

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Is Childhood PTSD Making You Seem Unavailable?

It’s very, very common for people with Childhood PTSD to feel they only know how to attract unavailable and screwed up partners. How can you attract healthy people instead? Answer: With a bright cab light. “Cab light” is slang for the vibe you give off to prospective partners, attracting them toward you when bright, or …

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CPTSD: Four Discoveries That Revolutionized Treatment

Now that we know adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) can cause neurological changes, the old, mostly psychological approaches to treating CPTSD are making way for newer, brain-based treatments that hold promise for millions of survivors. In this video I talk about four discoveries that transformed our old understanding of the problem. I describe more effective strategies …

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Part 2: CPTSD and The Pain of Loving Unavailable People

Early trauma like abuse and neglect in childhood can negatively impact our capacity to have healthy romantic relationships. This is the second of two excerpts from one video in my NEW course (there are 27 videos in total). The course is about changing negative relationship patterns that are common for people with Childhood PTSD, and …

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CPTSD and The Attraction to Unavailable People: Video Excerpt From New Course (Part 1)

Last fall I surveyed followers of the Crappy Childhood Fairy to ask what topics I should be sure to cover in my new course on Dating and Relationships. By far, the number one answer was “dating unavailable and inappropriate people”. The new course is open for registration (!!!) and I wanted to give you a …

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